Well, I took Jack in tot he Dr.'s office today for a weight check. I have been wanting to take him in for a week or so just to check and make sure he is gaining weight...
Well, He hadn't. In fact, he had lost weight... He was born at 7lb 9oz. At 1 week he was 6lb 12 oz. At two weeks he was 7lb 4 oz, and today, at 4 weeks, he weighed in at 6lb 10oz. His lowest weight yet...
I was shocked. (and of course got emotional) I hadn't expected him to have gained a lot of weight, because he still feels about the same, but I had not at all expected that he would have lost weight.
He eats regularly, and seems satisfied when he does, so it must be that my milk doesn't have enough calories in it or something. The Dr. told me to start supplementing about 3 times a day. I hate that I have to do that... and I know I shouldn't, but part of me feels it is my fault... maybe I am not eating healthy enough, or drinking enough water (which I know I'm not, but working on...) I don't know. It just sucks. I really don't want to give him a bottle, but I obviously care more about his health than anything.
This whole birth and mommy hood process has been great, though frustrating at times... I think that everything I have wanted has happened completely opposite. For example:
I didn't want to be induced, and I was.
I didn't want an epidural, but I got one. (back labor)
I didn't want a C-section, but had to have one. (cephalo-pelvic disproportion)
Wanted to breastfeed exclusively, and I have to supplement.
There are other little things too, but those are the main ones. I guess it just goes to show you that if you make plans... they mean pretty much nothing. I understand why things have happened the way they have, and I probably wouldn't change anything, but it is still hard.
I am just so glad that we have an adorable, healthy and alert baby boy. Jack is truly the light of my life, and I already love him sooooo much. It is unbelievable. I whisper "I love you" to him and tear up. It is powerful!
Anyways, I have gone off on a tangent. I just pray that this next week Jack gains weight with the supplementing. I am taking him back in a week for another weight check, and if he doesn't gain weight, we will have to start testing to find out why. Prayers would be appreciated! =)
*Oh! and I get the rest of his photo shoot pictures tomorrow! So be on the lookout for those!
2 comments:
I know how you feel. I wanted a natural birth without an epidural too and had to have a c-section. Atleast you can breastfeed, I have to pump my milk and give it to the baby and he has formula most of the time cuz my supply has dropped big time.
http://brittanysdreamland.blogspot.com/
Aw, I don't know how old your little guy is (he's adorable) but my mom went through the same thing with me.
I ate well and was very alert and healthy but I just didn't put on weight for a long time. Mom said she wanted to cry every time someone asked her about her "newborn" when I was far from it.
Fortunately, I eventually did gain weight and turned out just fine.
All that to say, hang in there!
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